/bypass

So lets be honest here folks, because that’s what I  am mainly all about, and this blog can prove that many times over. Right now, I am wheezing, red, sweaty and pretty much on death’s porch swing having a complete physical breakdown, on the verge of throwing in the dripping towel — and only after 20 minutes of running, or what I am calling ‘running’ even though in reality it was more like sauntering.

I have not exercised since my last yoga class of november 2009. I decided to get really lazy and basically put myself on bedrest for no valid reason, while i porked, in small portions of course. Actually truth be told, I haven’t slipped as far as food goes, not really. I still cannot handle sugars, except the little I put in my coffee. BUT, the responsibility of MOVING AROUND has been slapped under the comfy chairs I have been parking my saggy skinned bum in. This, among other things, is what I have decided to change up.

I think it’s quite obvious that I have some sort of seasonal depression and I become quite subdued after Christmas, allowing my brain to shut off, my goals to disappear and my priorities to become lost under the bleakness felt from the lack of vitamin D. Usually, around this time, where I have moped and cried for too long, I make turn around decisions.

So the other day I received $1000 for academic achievement and I decided to spend $200 to get a brand, and spanking new pair of running shoes that are specially designed for my cushioning needs. My goal is to RUN, without pain, without dying afterwards, without chest pains etc etc — run for a long period of time.

There are a few obstacles however and pardon if I get graphic here:

1. Floppity Flop boobs

2. The infamous ankle break of 2008 seems to have screwed up my stride, as I have “nursed” the wound by turning my ankle slightly inward. The dude who did my shoes told me about this and warned me that straightening OUT my ankle might be painful at first and that I’d have to get used to that.  So yeah, after a little while, it starts to feel crappy and it makes me nervous.

3. Girl who worked out beside me today. Who in their right mind wears tapered black jeans, hiking boots, their extremely long hair down over their logger’s plaid long sleeved shirt while they are gazelling on an elliptical at 100 kilometers an hour, not breaking a sweat over their freakishly beautiful face. I kept having to, like, speed the treadmill up thinking that she, in her infinite lumberjack princess ways, was judging me and my bright orange shoes, with leggings and over-sized blue shirt that does nothing to hide the floppity flops mentioned in point number 1.

4. My LAN party hip keeps clicking and it sucks! This also makes me nervous.

I have to start somewhere though right?

I haven’t lost any weight since the last time that I posted. I think I might have gained 2 pounds. IT IS POSSIBLE if you let yourself go. I mean, yeah I am not eating anything, right? BUT your body gets complacent and all like, yo, i’m gunna screw with you, chickie, so there! Last time I weighed was yesterday and I was 208. So it’s time to get back in the game.

My goals are to learn how to run, so if anyone has any running advice, please don’t hesitate. I basically just wanna know everything there is to know.

I mean, should I just be walking right now? Should I even try to run without walking first?